I was recently tagged by Emilyannlou to take part in her 5 Rules I Live By series and I’m ready for something unique on my blog, so I agreed. Some (maybe all) of these will make you sit back and think “what a weirdo” but as Emily said in her post, we all are and we should embrace it. Ok, so here goes:
1. I never eat lunch before 12pm.
I don’t know why but I never have and never will. It doesn’t matter if I’m starving from having had no breakfast (which is nearly always), I still have to wait until 12. What is even weirder is that it is only lunch that I have this rule for. I don’t have a similar rule for breakfast or dinner. The more I think about this, the stranger it seems and I really have no reason for it at all.
2. Be kind to everyone until they are unkind to you.
Might seem an obvious one but you’d be surprised how many people I seem to come across who don’t live by this rule. I don’t see any reason why I wouldn’t offer my seat on public transport to someone who clearly needs it more than I do. I don’t think anything of helping someone or making someone’s life slightly easier in some way and you know what? It makes ME feel good. Writing that reminds me of the Friends episode where Phoebe tries her hardest to find a selfless good deed. I say that it doesn’t matter if you do it for selfish reasons. If you’ve put a smile on someone’s face, who really cares about your motives? Taylor Swift once said “Being kind is a wonderful legacy to leave behind”. Yeah, yeah it is.
3. I cannot control every little thing in my life and I must be OK with that.
This is something that I learned when I was in CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy for those of you who don’t know). I have written about it on this blog before but it was a while ago. Around two years ago, I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression because I could not stop worrying about everything AND I couldn’t remember the last time I’d felt happy so I began taking medication and attending therapy. My therapist was amazing and over the course of a year, she taught me that although I would like to, I cannot control how everything turns out. One of my biggest problems was obsessing over making sure that nothing went wrong in my life. Ever. I don’t know if you’ve ever tried that but it is incredibly stressful and really really tiring because *drum roll*… it is, of course, impossible. Who’d have thought, eh? For some reason I didn’t know that a couple of years ago but I have slowly learnt to accept that devastating fact and live with it.
FYI, I actually JUST had an anxiety-fuelled half an hour while writing this post where I just stopped and couldn’t write because I realised that my house cat had been out for almost the whole day. My chest seized up and my breath shortened for an entire 30 minutes until he showed up at the door. So yeah, I’m not sure that demon will ever be completely exorcised.
I also still have days where I feel incredibly alone and sad especially since my six year relationship ended last September. There are days where I’d much rather stay in bed than go to work and face the world but I no longer take my tablets or go to therapy because finally, it’s not every day anymore. Sometimes I am actually happy to be alive and embrace those days wholeheartedly. Progress!
4. Escape reality at least once a day.
For me, it’s mainly books. I am very into fantasy and a world full of magic and mystical creatures is as far from the bleakness of reality as possible and so it works for me. As well as the Harry Potter series, which has actually been my only constant companion since I was 10, I also love anything with princesses, superheroes, dragons, demons and ghosts. Supernatural, Game of Thrones, Disney. Throw me into any world that is farfetched, ridiculous but completely beautiful at least once every day forever, please.
5. When in doubt, think “What would Taylor do?”
It will be no secret to anyone who knows me that Taylor Swift is my queen. I love her in the way that most people love Beyonce. Not only do I love her music but I also love her image, her style, her strength and her determination. Whenever I’m scared or confused or feeling a bit shit about myself, I honestly do think to myself “what would Taylor do?” Taylor would always tell me to be fearless, dance like I’m 22 and to never grow up. So I’ll try my best, girl, I really will.
I tag YOU to carry this series on. I found this really therapeutic and enjoyable, so I really think that anyone reading this should dig in deep and realise your rules. Even if you don’t have a blog, write down your rules and read through them every now and then. Who knows? Ten years from now, you might look back and realise what a strange, awesome, unique person you were.